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Where Have I Been?

Well, I have been here. Mostly home trying to occupy time. A little bit ago I had X-Rays done on my Knee. After the follow-up appointment put me in a funk. The doctor gave me a list of do’s and don’ts. More don’ts than do’s though. Not happy about it. But it is understandable. She is a great doctor and looking out for my best interests and my health.

So here is the diagnosis. Arthritis. Not Rheumatoid yet. But my RF is still climbing and that will come in time she said. So for now Osteoarthritis is the issue. She said I had it in multiple locations. Bleh! So she banned me from doing my workouts for 6 weeks. I have PT but it seems to be making it worse, that makes me cranky. Not just that but the fact that I have goals I want to meet and these PT exercises are not big calorie burners. Most of them are done seated, not much of a workout. Soon I will be allowed to do some yoga though. I am looking forward to getting to do anything right now.

The point in the PT is to get the joint stronger and more lubricated. Then I go back and see the doctor and she is going to see where things are at pain wise. If they are not satisfactory she will refer me to an Orthopedic specialist and start me on corticosteroid injections in the knee. The way the knee is now that I am going through the PT it is pretty much a given the injections will happen. I am ready to get them. I have enough pain from the Fybromyalgia and Raynaud’s disease.

All I know is I am ready to get back to “real”, more productive workouts. I want to see results. I don’t want to sit around on my ass all day when I would rather get in some Pump or jog or even power walk. In due time though. Patience is key and pushing it and possible opening myself up to further injury is not a worth risk taking.

So I am around. I am pouting. I am bored. But I am alright. Hoping soon things will start going my way, if not with the help of the doctor we can hopefully find a middle ground that satisfies both of us.

I may not blog daily but I will still blog on occasion until things get moving again.

Lunges Suck

lmp day 36

Well not really. I just don’t like them. It hurts and I swear through the entire track. In between the billion lunges that you have to do during the leg track on Les Mills Pump, Pump & Shred there is a short burst of squats. Those squats are like heaven. Because they relieve the pressure from my calves and knees and because they are not lunges. I may not like them but I still push through them every time. I’d rather do anything else. Really hoping I can build up to doing them without it sucking so bad and not have to yell at the trainer on the DVD and call her horrible names while dropping the F-Bomb in between that. One of these days. Right? It is a good thing it is a DVD because the foul language spewing from my mouth would get me banned from any public place for sure. I could totally make a sailor blush.

So today was the first day of Phase Two and Day 36 of Les Mills Pump. So that leaves 86 days until Round One is completed. Today’s workout was of course Pump and Shred as I stated above. It went well. During the squat track I was able to double the weight on the bar this time. Super exciting! Thinking for the back track I will up the weight once these darn stitches are out and the Clean and Presses can be done with a full on grip. During those I have been holding the bar with my bum finger extended instead of gripping the bar. To much pressure on the stitches. The stitches come out tomorrow afternoon. Hoping the gash is closed up enough to return to life as normal.


Now It is time to have a healthy snack and focus on watching a movie. Halloween II started right when I started blogging! Love, Love, Love all the horror movies that are on in October. If my family weren’t a bunch of scaredy cats they would be on 24/7!


I’m Here to Bitch and Moan

I am typing this as the smell of freshly baked boxed brownies wafts through my house. It is making me really unhappy and unsupported. Normally I can handle temptation and rarely even feel like I diet, but right now I have been struggling with it and this is the last thing I need right now. I feel like crap is getting waved in my face and I am being teased. Oh I know, I sound dramatic as all get up. I know I do. Just can’t help it.

DH is sitting here eating burritos and baking up a box of brownies.. Really not fair!!!! I have to make myself some clean eating friendly dessert for me tomorrow. Either some quinoa trail mix balls or maybe I can grind up some quinoa and make it into brownies somehow. May have to experiment tomorrow.

I may still be 270 calories shy for the day after 3 meals and 2 snacks and calorie wise I could afford a brownie. With the way I have been feeling this week I know I would binge. And having one would defeat the purpose of eating clean.

So not happy right now. I want junk too! My brain says no but my hormones say…  CHOCOLATE!!!!!!!


p.s. DH I love you but you are a jerk

Measurements and goals

I am finally getting to the part I hate the most about blogging about weight loss and such. Telling the world just how heavy and round I am and them showing terrible pictures of myself in a sports bra. But accountability is accountability and what is the point of all this if I don’t make my self accountable? There really isn’t a point if I don’t.

So here is my plan. Prepregnancy when I was blogging my weight loss I weighed and measured in weekly. This time around the plan is to do it at the end of every 30 day phase. So every 30 days an updates set of measurements, updated progress photos as well as current weight. The plan was to do it weekly but this time around I just want to do it differently and to stay away from the measuring tape and scale as much as possible. Honestly I am not mentally prepared to put myself out here like this. The will probably be a meltdown as soon as the Publish button is hit.

So here are my stats for the beginning of Phase One:

Day 1 Day 30 Day 60 Day 90 Day 120
WAIST 42.5”
HIPS 45.5”
BUST 42”
NECK 13”
L. UPPER ARM 12.75”
R. THIGH 27.75”
L. THIGH 27.5
R. CALF 15.75”
L. CALF 15.75”
WEIGHT 189.7
BMI 30.6 (obese)

And the always dreaded and super terrible Day 1 pics:




My goal for the first 30 days is to lose 5 pounds and 5 inches. But if I lose more that would be great 🙂

Well, I did get outside…

Holy cow did I struggle with my run this morning. my lungs apparently do not like chilly air at all. I had my inhaler with me thank goodness! Then as I am running my allergies kick up and my nose starts running, coughing begins and my sinus’ start draining. YUCK! I ended up going for a bit over 3K in 25 minutes doing  walk to run intervals, then I decided that I couldn’t take it anymore. Running outside is hard, on my lungs and allergies that is. I did find though that my legs and feet were far better off than they are after putting in my 5k on the treadmill. The time passed quite a bit faster, I thought I was throwing in the towel too soon but once my Nano voiced the time to me I realized it wasn’t just 10 minutes so I didn’t feel so bad. Easing into this is something that I am going to have to do, oh and take an allergy pill afterwards.

To sum it up here are my pros and cons of outdoor running:

  • Lungs hate cool air
  • Allergies and no tissue
  • Couldn’t breathe because of both of these things
  • Time passed quickly
  • Less pain
  • Scenery
I think that in time the cons will work themselves out. it will take some adjustment, maybe will have to stick with intervals for a while but I will get to the 5k in no time, I hope 🙂

After my grueling run I did my Pump workout, had breakfast, then started yard work. Next I went and purchased more plants for the yard, came back and started ripping out shrubs and HUGE, well rooted bushes (I planted then five years ago), showered, went to dinner with my in-laws came home and finished ripping out shrubs and bushes. I have everything now measured out and started placing the plants where I want them to be so I can get them in on Sunday. I just gave up on the yard for the night. It just got to dark and I am all sorts of sore. I think the tub is calling my name. And with only getting under 2 hours of sleep last night I am a bit worn out. Boy, do I wish some days had more hours in them!

Wedding tomorrow so I better go get cleaned up and get some sleep, have to get up early and get Emma ready for a game, squeeze in a run, Pump, then shower and get ready for the festivities. I have an awesome looking tank top/sports bra farmers sunburn, should look sexy with my one sleeved dress! HAHA!

Tuesday Morning Weigh in is Postponed

Meet Max I blame this 20 lb behemoth cat for my scale issues.

Last night I got on the scale (it was around Midnight so it technically was not cheating and weighing in early), it said 164! So excited, then this morning it said 164, then 189, then 200, then 169, then 172. So yeah, I have no idea what I weigh. I did go grab my old scale that was weighing me heavier and it said 168. So I think I am going to go buy a new scale today and weigh back in after. I swear my huge cat sleeping on it all the time messed it up. I flipped it over and noticed that the legs on it were jamming up, so there is the issue. I wish I still had the box and receipt so I can just exchange it. I haven’t had it that long. But oh well. It is what it is and it is a jacked up scale. All I know is that there is no way in hell I gained 29 pounds in a week! I really don’t think there is any way I gained an ounce really. But I will get a new scale and we will see. So I will more than likely weigh tonight and post my results tomorrow morning. I am just hoping those lower numbers last night and this morning don’t leave me disappointed.

I really do think my big cat constantly sleeping on the  scale, jumping on the scale along with his other cat like shenanigans is what has messed the darn thing up. I am so annoyed right now because the stupid scale got me all excited and now I am sure that the numbers are totally wrong, even if I did get them twice (last night and this morning) UGH!!! Anyhow, enough ranting, whining and complaining. All I know is I think I look visibly smaller this week and I want the stupid scale to reflect it. And I am being a big baby right now because I don’t actually know.

I have a super busy day today and company tonight to watch Smash, New Girl and Glee so this will be today’s only post. Thanks for reading and have a wonderful day!

Does my ass make my ass look big?

Yesterday was rough for me. It seemed that everything I put on make me look like a heifer, even all the new size 12’s I bought last week. How is that there was no weight gain and even a bit of inches lost and I saw myself as fat as I was when I stated all this? Anyhow, everything I tried on I hated. I liked the clothes, but they didn’t look right to me. Being that discouraged made me want to throw in the towel, I had this feeling that all this hard work has been for nothing. Why did I do that to myself? it is not like I wanted to feel that was, self sabotage was not my plan at all. Some of the unhappiness I have been feeling over other things must be wearing me down. Not to worry though nothing is permanent.

So today is Wednesday, it is day 79 of Les Mills Pump, I still love it on day 79 just as much as I did on day one. I am still grateful that I gave it a go. If there were live classes around here I would get a gym membership in a second. I think that I am finally to the point where I don’t feel too fat for group fitness. Shyness is something that really came with weight gain. I am getting back to my more open outgoing, who give a damn what you think self again, I know it sounds strange after the first part of this blog. Yesterday was a rough day for some reason, that’s all.

The carpet people are coming to measure today! I went and confirmed what color and pile I wanted, sugar cookie.  Why is it that I always like the most expensive of everything. Even before I have a clue what the price is I always find that I gravitate to items of a higher cost? I must have good taste 🙂 I did find a new chair I really liked. I need to find a couple more I like so there are choices. And no luck on a TV/media stand. I think we need to make the two-hour trek to Ikea maybe. Haven’t even started looking for shelving for the archway wall.  The house is a huge mess. Furniture all over, the stuff from the walls strewn about which leads to making more clutter. How does that happen? Things will be in order soon enough. I can’t wait for the living room, Purple room (sitting and treadmill room right now but soon to be an office), steps and hallway to have it’s pretty new floor coverings!

Time to get going with my day. The kiddo is off to school, time for me to get going on part one of my workouts. I am super starving today, I can’t wait to eat breakfast. I don’t think I got me calories in to calories out ratio right. I had a major calorie burn yesterday, just about 1000 cals! That must be why I am starving.

Just one more random thought. I really, REALLY want a sashimi lunch from Hello Sushi. If they were open right now that would be my breakfast. I have been craving sashimi for a week now at least!

Have a great day everyone!


I want a do over!

Got up this morning and got Emma off to school as usual. I got half ready to make my pre-run breakfast. I didn’t get any further along. I maybe slept two hours last night. Between the storm freaking out the dog and me having a hard time falling back to sleep I may of been better of just staying up. Tico my beagle mix is usually never afraid of storms, the cracks of thunder that freaked him out must of sounded like fireworks or gun shots. Those two things scare the pee out of him, literally. My bed is screaming my name, loudly. Thinking of answering it’s call. Working out with no sleep is not good and I don’t want to take a day off just because my dog was freaked out. Round one is so close to being done, now is not the time to mess it up! So back to bed I go for a two hour nap and some much needed sleep. My body needs it, my run and Pump Extreme kicked my butt (in a great way) yesterday.


My Scaredy Beagle

The “fat’ Mom.

Have you ever went to a function and left really feeling like a whale? That was me today. Why is it that the dumbest things can get us thinking and in negative ways. Why is it that we feel the need to fit in or get jealous?

My daughter had her first game today, and sitting on the bleachers with all the other Baseball Moms really made me feel like crap. I was the “fat” mom of the group. UGH.  No one said, did or acted in any certain way to make me feel self conscience at all. Just them all standing there drinking their sugary hot chocolates and eating candy while being stupid skinny while I sat having water with a side of water and was fat. Everyone was making plans to go get ice cream and burgers after. I was invited but I passed. Went home and had more water and some chili with tons of veggies. Now it’s time to get some exercise Les Mills Pump and the Treadmill are expecting me today. I’d rather be social and go eat junk food and be skinny like everyone else. But alas, I can’t, time to put on my big girl panties and get the heck over it.

I know that this sounds very childish and whiny but I can’t help it. No one can be confident 100% of the time. I am sure I will get over it in no time also. Just had to vent!

On another note. Emma had a blast at her game! And I got her some ice cream after. Got to live vicariously through her. 🙂

Tuesday Weigh in Week 9 *sigh*

It is that time again. I’ve got my scale and tape measure handy and I am ready to go. I am not sure how accurate anything will be this week. I have some MAJOR bloating issues and still have a pot belly going on, swollen from my stomach to thighs (I can feel the fluid, yuck). My Fibromyalgia is flared up pretty badly. I feel foggy and things that should be easy are getting more and more confusing. I went to Zumba last night and wow, did I have a really hard time catching on. I did 100 times better last time, and that was my first go at it. Oh well, I did my best and worked up a really good sweat. That is all that matters. Right now I am hoping this fog, the bloat and the elevated pain passes quick. I am definitely going to have to tone down the weights for now. I really hope it doesn’t set me back to far. Ah, the life of a cripple.

I had to go pant shopping yesterday, needed some dress slacks for a Showing this afternoon. I hate shopping when bloated, makes finding things harder. I was still able to buy a size 12 though. So I was happy.

Let me hop on the scale and get this done and over with:

  • Chest: 36 inches  (- 0 inches)
  • R Arm: 12 inches  (- 0 inches)
  • L  Arm: 12 inches (- 0 inches)
  • Waist: 32 inches (- 0 inches)
  • Hips: 41 inches (- 0 inches)
  • R Thigh: 24.5 inches (- 0 inches)
  • L Thigh: 24.5 inches (- 0 inches)
  • Weight: 171 pounds (-0 pounds)
  • Pant Size: 12
  • BMI: 29.9

Well, that wasn’t as bad as I though it would be, all the bloat sits above and below where I measure. How convenient! So no change this week. Not exactly pleased but I will accept it and move on. I think I need to step up the cardio or go a little stricter with the diet so I can get some sure changes for next week. Hoping it will clear out this water weight I am carrying around right now. I really dislike weeks with no change they feel like set backs and are disappointing. It is the beginning of a new fitness week for me so time to change that!

Have a great Tuesday everyone.



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