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Where Have I Been?

Well, I have been here. Mostly home trying to occupy time. A little bit ago I had X-Rays done on my Knee. After the follow-up appointment put me in a funk. The doctor gave me a list of do’s and don’ts. More don’ts than do’s though. Not happy about it. But it is understandable. She is a great doctor and looking out for my best interests and my health.

So here is the diagnosis. Arthritis. Not Rheumatoid yet. But my RF is still climbing and that will come in time she said. So for now Osteoarthritis is the issue. She said I had it in multiple locations. Bleh! So she banned me from doing my workouts for 6 weeks. I have PT but it seems to be making it worse, that makes me cranky. Not just that but the fact that I have goals I want to meet and these PT exercises are not big calorie burners. Most of them are done seated, not much of a workout. Soon I will be allowed to do some yoga though. I am looking forward to getting to do anything right now.

The point in the PT is to get the joint stronger and more lubricated. Then I go back and see the doctor and she is going to see where things are at pain wise. If they are not satisfactory she will refer me to an Orthopedic specialist and start me on corticosteroid injections in the knee. The way the knee is now that I am going through the PT it is pretty much a given the injections will happen. I am ready to get them. I have enough pain from the Fybromyalgia and Raynaud’s disease.

All I know is I am ready to get back to “real”, more productive workouts. I want to see results. I don’t want to sit around on my ass all day when I would rather get in some Pump or jog or even power walk. In due time though. Patience is key and pushing it and possible opening myself up to further injury is not a worth risk taking.

So I am around. I am pouting. I am bored. But I am alright. Hoping soon things will start going my way, if not with the help of the doctor we can hopefully find a middle ground that satisfies both of us.

I may not blog daily but I will still blog on occasion until things get moving again.

Day 6 of 120

Finally finished with today’s workout.  I am a bit disappointed in it though. My copy of Hard Core Abs is MIA so I borrowed a couple ab DVDs from a friend. First I tried her Insanity Insane Abs. The DVD must have been bootlegged, the system was bought off of a guy on Craigslist. After a quick search on the Beachbody threads they said the bootleg Amazon, Craigslist and Ebay copies are often like that and the buyers never know until they try them.  It just skipped all over the place and never actually got to an actual workout. So I popped in a copy of Crunch Abs. It was alright. There was quite of bit of cardio and focus on squats and lunges, so I was getting annoyed. Finally after a while she started on actual ab work and that was good. I just honestly feel like I wasted a bunch of time on fast forwarding through a DVD that was no good and did a bunch of aerobics. Hard Core Abs killed me especially in the beginning of the program and I guess I just expect that.

I had contacted my Beachbody Coach and she could not help me get a new copy of Hard Core Abs but gave me a contact number and email to try to hopefully get help. So after contacting them I was told they DO NOT sell any of the DVDs that come with the Les Mills Pump kits separately and I would have to repurchase the entire system. I already spent $300 on the Les Mills Pump kit along with the Les Mills Pump Extreme add-on. No way I am spending that again for one single DVD. After a few emails back and forth and a few debates they offered to replace it for me if I found my receipt. UGH!!  The system was purchased in February of 2012! I knew I didn’t have it and it more than likely was destroyed in the basement flood. Anyhow after a ton of waiting on hold and emails I found a rep who was willing to look up the order numbers and all that for me! Yay for nice people! After I had the information the people I spoke to before said they would replace it this once for FREE! But never replace part of the system for me again. That’s fine with me. So hopefully it will be here soon and I can do the actual workout I should be doing. YAY!


Can I punch you in the face?

I am seriously irritated and frustrated today. This means I want to do nothing. That includes working out. The feeling that I just want to punch someone is what I am feeling. Being cranky really sucks. I’m not used to be a Debbie Downer but today… Let’s just say watch out world. I probably go suck it up and do my workout so I can blow off some steam. UGH!

There are things I really need to do that I don’t want to do at all on top of being frustrated, that frustrates me more. Like shopping for a bathing suit. I got our pool up yesterday. Enjoying it will be nice but I lack a suit. Due to weather I skated out of buying one the last time I was supposed to shop for one but now I need it. our little blue pool will be calling my name with all this heat we have had! I also need to get more pool chemicals.. that does not frustrate me, or annoy me though.


Tuesday Morning Weigh in is Postponed

Meet Max I blame this 20 lb behemoth cat for my scale issues.

Last night I got on the scale (it was around Midnight so it technically was not cheating and weighing in early), it said 164! So excited, then this morning it said 164, then 189, then 200, then 169, then 172. So yeah, I have no idea what I weigh. I did go grab my old scale that was weighing me heavier and it said 168. So I think I am going to go buy a new scale today and weigh back in after. I swear my huge cat sleeping on it all the time messed it up. I flipped it over and noticed that the legs on it were jamming up, so there is the issue. I wish I still had the box and receipt so I can just exchange it. I haven’t had it that long. But oh well. It is what it is and it is a jacked up scale. All I know is that there is no way in hell I gained 29 pounds in a week! I really don’t think there is any way I gained an ounce really. But I will get a new scale and we will see. So I will more than likely weigh tonight and post my results tomorrow morning. I am just hoping those lower numbers last night and this morning don’t leave me disappointed.

I really do think my big cat constantly sleeping on the  scale, jumping on the scale along with his other cat like shenanigans is what has messed the darn thing up. I am so annoyed right now because the stupid scale got me all excited and now I am sure that the numbers are totally wrong, even if I did get them twice (last night and this morning) UGH!!! Anyhow, enough ranting, whining and complaining. All I know is I think I look visibly smaller this week and I want the stupid scale to reflect it. And I am being a big baby right now because I don’t actually know.

I have a super busy day today and company tonight to watch Smash, New Girl and Glee so this will be today’s only post. Thanks for reading and have a wonderful day!

Does my ass make my ass look big?

Yesterday was rough for me. It seemed that everything I put on make me look like a heifer, even all the new size 12’s I bought last week. How is that there was no weight gain and even a bit of inches lost and I saw myself as fat as I was when I stated all this? Anyhow, everything I tried on I hated. I liked the clothes, but they didn’t look right to me. Being that discouraged made me want to throw in the towel, I had this feeling that all this hard work has been for nothing. Why did I do that to myself? it is not like I wanted to feel that was, self sabotage was not my plan at all. Some of the unhappiness I have been feeling over other things must be wearing me down. Not to worry though nothing is permanent.

So today is Wednesday, it is day 79 of Les Mills Pump, I still love it on day 79 just as much as I did on day one. I am still grateful that I gave it a go. If there were live classes around here I would get a gym membership in a second. I think that I am finally to the point where I don’t feel too fat for group fitness. Shyness is something that really came with weight gain. I am getting back to my more open outgoing, who give a damn what you think self again, I know it sounds strange after the first part of this blog. Yesterday was a rough day for some reason, that’s all.

The carpet people are coming to measure today! I went and confirmed what color and pile I wanted, sugar cookie.  Why is it that I always like the most expensive of everything. Even before I have a clue what the price is I always find that I gravitate to items of a higher cost? I must have good taste 🙂 I did find a new chair I really liked. I need to find a couple more I like so there are choices. And no luck on a TV/media stand. I think we need to make the two-hour trek to Ikea maybe. Haven’t even started looking for shelving for the archway wall.  The house is a huge mess. Furniture all over, the stuff from the walls strewn about which leads to making more clutter. How does that happen? Things will be in order soon enough. I can’t wait for the living room, Purple room (sitting and treadmill room right now but soon to be an office), steps and hallway to have it’s pretty new floor coverings!

Time to get going with my day. The kiddo is off to school, time for me to get going on part one of my workouts. I am super starving today, I can’t wait to eat breakfast. I don’t think I got me calories in to calories out ratio right. I had a major calorie burn yesterday, just about 1000 cals! That must be why I am starving.

Just one more random thought. I really, REALLY want a sashimi lunch from Hello Sushi. If they were open right now that would be my breakfast. I have been craving sashimi for a week now at least!

Have a great day everyone!


The “fat’ Mom.

Have you ever went to a function and left really feeling like a whale? That was me today. Why is it that the dumbest things can get us thinking and in negative ways. Why is it that we feel the need to fit in or get jealous?

My daughter had her first game today, and sitting on the bleachers with all the other Baseball Moms really made me feel like crap. I was the “fat” mom of the group. UGH.  No one said, did or acted in any certain way to make me feel self conscience at all. Just them all standing there drinking their sugary hot chocolates and eating candy while being stupid skinny while I sat having water with a side of water and was fat. Everyone was making plans to go get ice cream and burgers after. I was invited but I passed. Went home and had more water and some chili with tons of veggies. Now it’s time to get some exercise Les Mills Pump and the Treadmill are expecting me today. I’d rather be social and go eat junk food and be skinny like everyone else. But alas, I can’t, time to put on my big girl panties and get the heck over it.

I know that this sounds very childish and whiny but I can’t help it. No one can be confident 100% of the time. I am sure I will get over it in no time also. Just had to vent!

On another note. Emma had a blast at her game! And I got her some ice cream after. Got to live vicariously through her. 🙂

Tuesday Weigh in Week 9 *sigh*

It is that time again. I’ve got my scale and tape measure handy and I am ready to go. I am not sure how accurate anything will be this week. I have some MAJOR bloating issues and still have a pot belly going on, swollen from my stomach to thighs (I can feel the fluid, yuck). My Fibromyalgia is flared up pretty badly. I feel foggy and things that should be easy are getting more and more confusing. I went to Zumba last night and wow, did I have a really hard time catching on. I did 100 times better last time, and that was my first go at it. Oh well, I did my best and worked up a really good sweat. That is all that matters. Right now I am hoping this fog, the bloat and the elevated pain passes quick. I am definitely going to have to tone down the weights for now. I really hope it doesn’t set me back to far. Ah, the life of a cripple.

I had to go pant shopping yesterday, needed some dress slacks for a Showing this afternoon. I hate shopping when bloated, makes finding things harder. I was still able to buy a size 12 though. So I was happy.

Let me hop on the scale and get this done and over with:

  • Chest: 36 inches  (- 0 inches)
  • R Arm: 12 inches  (- 0 inches)
  • L  Arm: 12 inches (- 0 inches)
  • Waist: 32 inches (- 0 inches)
  • Hips: 41 inches (- 0 inches)
  • R Thigh: 24.5 inches (- 0 inches)
  • L Thigh: 24.5 inches (- 0 inches)
  • Weight: 171 pounds (-0 pounds)
  • Pant Size: 12
  • BMI: 29.9

Well, that wasn’t as bad as I though it would be, all the bloat sits above and below where I measure. How convenient! So no change this week. Not exactly pleased but I will accept it and move on. I think I need to step up the cardio or go a little stricter with the diet so I can get some sure changes for next week. Hoping it will clear out this water weight I am carrying around right now. I really dislike weeks with no change they feel like set backs and are disappointing. It is the beginning of a new fitness week for me so time to change that!

Have a great Tuesday everyone.


I Had A Dream That…..


Now I am going to sit here and feel sorry for myself while reading food blogs and looking at sweets on pinterest.

B**** I’m 36 months pregnant. Really?

Who pissed in my Cheerios today? So far it seems the entire world….

So I woke up today cranky as all get up. I have never been one to be a morning person so a slight amount of temporary crankiness is not all that unusual. But today, watch out. I feel like ripping the first person who looks at me sideways’ head off. I am so tired. I think I may die. Seriously! I have on average getting three and a half hours of sleep a night for a while now, so I am always tired. I am constantly sore and feel like my body does not recover from my workouts and I think this could be lack of sleep. So I am moody from the constant aches on top of my Fibromyalgia being flared up right now. I hate waking up on the wrong side of the bed. why the heck do they call it that anyhow? Wrong side? Do I have another option? Should I try to climb over the dog then over  my husband and see if that puts me in a better mood because getting to the other side of the bed is like going through an obstacle course. I don’t see that starting my day in a sunny disposition. You try it and let me know how that works out for you. Anyhow here is my morning. Woke up tired and sore, Emma was hard to get up and a pain in the butt (this is rare), the bus came early so I sent her running like a mad child to the bus stop with book bag and coat in hand. I may of just won the mom of the year award for that one. Note the sarcasm. Then I decided to try to take a nap for an hour, didn’t work two of the three cats needed cat food or they were going to die at that moment apparently. UGH.

Then I once again for the billionth time get asked if I am pregnant. No bitch I am just fat. Really?? I do not look pregnant. I may not be the size zero/one I was 15 years ago but damn. I hate this question, it started happening on a regular basis about the time of my high school reunion. My being a size 6 at the time apparently meant I was knocked up or popped out a billion babies because compared to when I was 17  I was fat. Piss off  people really. It just got worse as I got bigger. Then people would say after told I was not with child and had one x amount of time ago.. Oh you had a baby it isn’t your fault you got fat, I started modeling again weeks after giving birth. It was not that and even then I was a size 6. Whoop tee friggin do. So I was a stick figure as a child and teen. Doesn’t mean that I would of always been one. And I can tell you now. I am working my butt off to get into shape. But no way will I push myself to be a certain size or weight. Granted I have goals set, but I didn’t put them in stone.  Oh and the amount of work I have put in over the course of a year to go from a 20 to a 12 you basically mock when you ask stupid ass questions like that. The follow up question usually is after all that and I rudely tell someone I am pregnant with a hundred babies or years along in my pregnancy is how did you get so fat? None of your business, but if you must know, illness, bed rest, broken bones, surgeries, steroids, lyrica, all the fun stuff that just happens. I’m over it so why don’t you leave me alone to go sulk now that you think I am fat enough to be knocked up. Walk away before I knock you out.

Whew, I feel much better now.

Now that that is all cleared out on to something I am happy about. Nothing big I was just excited to log on last night and see that my little blog here has had over 1,000 hits. Yay!  It is not a huge deal I know but I thought it was pretty awesome.

This week I did Pump Extreme for the first time. Extreme is friggin’ right. It was one heck of a work out; 55 minutes, over 800 reps, great music, more clean and press (my favorite move), and quite a challenge. I am still feeling the burn, but in a good way. I loved the “team” effort on each track, it changed things up a bit. The only thing that was missing was Asa (she’s my favorite). The banter between Dan and Rachel cracked me up. It’s weird how personalities on a workout DVD can actually not annoy me. Most workout videos I feel the need to poke fun of the trainers or am really annoyed with the high pitched hey look I’m cheery voices or the super scary and creepy perma smiles they have. None of this with the Les Mills Pump workouts. Thank goodness!

Well, onto the rest of my day and I am not cranky anymore after my venting it out on here. I have errands to run, food to eat and workouts to do.

Tuesdays Gone (Week 6 Update)

My Future Paleontologist at the Sloan Museum, Flint, MI

My Future Paleontologist at the Sloan Museum, Flint, MI

I know I am a day late with my check in. Maybe I just wanted the chance to quote Lynard Skynard, or maybe it is because the kid is on Spring Break and we spent the day at the Sloan Museum checking out the Dinosaur Exhibit and Planetarium Show. I am going to say it was the second option with a splash of the first.  We had a good day discovering dinosaurs and then eating some very bad for you pizza. I had a salad and two very, very small slices. So it wasn’t terrible for a “cheat” meal (only 550 cals with the salad) but it wasn’t really worth it. Uno’s you disappoint me with your sub-par pizza that was covered in canned diced tomatoes. Oh well, what is done is done and what I have eaten I have eaten.  Granted I did have that attitude about it last night. I was bummed that it is Easter time and Resses Peanut butter Eggs are out and they are the best candy ever and i can’t allow myself to have them int he house, and I also did some major whining about the pizza. I wasn’t upset that I had eaten something I wanted just that I feel like it was a waste of empty calories and fat because it was not good pizza. I like to make any of my “cheater” meals to be tasty and worth all my hard work. Not mediocre and sad pizza drenched with canned tomatoes and very little cheese. My healthy version of pizza I make here at home is far better, so lesson learned. Uno’s pizza is not good, pizza from home is far tastier but pizza from the bar down the road and papa johns are pizza worth eating bad for one meal for.

I start Pump Revolution this week, Longer harder workouts, I am looking forward to seeing what it is like. I hope the squat tracks are not as brutal as they are on Pump and Shred. I love the Les Mills Pump Workouts but damn, I hate squats. I still push through though. I may be literally crying through it while cursing Rachel to the moon and back. But if it will give me her legs.. I better get on it and dig a little deeper. Tears are just water weight leaving my body anyhow right? I love Sheldon and his ab track, I had a couple of friends over to try out pump and see what they thought of Pump and they are in LOVE with Sheldon. I can quote one girl as saying “He can take me to the car wash…..(I’ll stop there)” I love that he is always singing along. He is very fun to watch. I have good things to say about all the instructors on the videos but I will talk about more of them in future posts. I don’t want to write a novel here.

I should probably get on to the weeks results so I can get onto coloring Easter Eggs with Miss Emma then figuring out what our healthy Easter menu will be for this year. No family in town this holiday so it will just be the three of us, that will make shopping easy!

Here are my results for this week:

  • Chest: 36 inches  (- 0 inches)
  • R Arm: 12 inches  (- 0 inches)
  • L  Arm: 12 inches (- 0 inches)
  • Waist: 35.5 inches (- 0.5 inches)
  • Hips: 42.5 inches (- 0.5 inches)
  • R Thigh: 25 inches (- 0 inches)
  • L Thigh: 25.5 inches (- 0.5 inches)
  • Weight: 174 pounds (- 0 pounds)
  • Pant Size: 14
  • BMI: 35.2


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